Is it Stress?
Day in and day out, our body responds to external situations. The fight-or-flight response is a normal healthy and vital way that our body responds to stressors. If a smoke-detector wakes you up from a deep sleep at midnight it is this ‘response’ that will have you alert and focused ready to jump out the window.
The problem is the body does not distinguish between life and death situations or a perceived danger that is psychological. In other words a tense parish meeting may release stress hormones that speed up your heart rate, increase your blood pressure and make you want to jump out the window. Instead you sit ‘calmly’ and steer the meeting toward a quiet resolution.
Extended periods of stress can wear you down and whilst your reactions may be quicker it can sometimes mean there is little time to count to ten and take in a few deep breaths.
Is it Burnout?
Burnout is different from stress. The body has stayed in a high-stress response for so long exhaustion has set in. Burnout is marked by a time of disengagement when the energy to express anger is gone and instead the most important thing is to avoid any further ‘attacks’. Feelings of failure and defeat come to the fore and it becomes easier to withdraw from responsibilities and avoid people rather than react to the situation.
Is it Depression?
Here is a basic checklist from BeyondBlue (www.beyondblue.com.au) to assess if depression may be an issue for you:
For the last 2 weeks you have had:
- Depressed mood?
- Loss of interest or pleasure?
If you answered yes to one of the above then complete the symptom checklist below:
- Depressed mood most of the day
- Less interest or pleasure in all activities
- Weight loss or gain (when not dieting)
- Sleeping difficulties
- Slowed or speeded movements
- Tiredness or loss of energy
- Feeling worthless
- Difficulty concentrating
- Thoughts of death
You wouldn’t think twice about seeing your GP if you break your leg. Doctors are just as interested if you are struggling with changes in how you are feeling or coping.
Is it Fear?
Fear of change, loss, or rejection can all be very strong emotions. In a society where it is not seen as masculine to talk about these feelings it can sometimes be easier to express yourself in what is considered a more acceptable way and that is with anger. As a priest or deacon you may even suppress this expression of how you are feeling. Don’t ignore how you are feeling and have some people around you that you can talk to honestly.
Do you need some tests?
We hear a lot of messages about signs and symptoms of sickness. Having an annual health check and having any symptoms investigated quickly can help keep you at your best.
Excuses, Excuses
Being grumpy could be a bad habit you are getting into and everyone is letting you get away with it. There’s no simple answer here but ‘if the shoe fits…..’.
Every year there are priests and deacons you know that are doing it tough.
- How can they be better supported and encouraged?
- How can the unique stresses and challenges of the clergy life be acknowledged and addressed?
- What connections or structures will assist guys to get the right help early?
These are some of the questions that need to be asked because when one of you becomes grumpy, disillusioned or disengaged it can be a very quick trip to being isolated.
Cheryle Davies
Clergy Healthcare Coordinator
Catholic Archdiocese of Brisbane /
Mt Olivet Hospital
